Holiness and a Cup of Coffee


Did you know the Bible teaches it is a husband’s duty to make his wife her coffee in the morning? Really! It’s in He-brews.

Kidding aside, making your wife her coffee in the morning is a great way to grow in holiness. It is a little act of kindness that you can do for her. It is an act of love in the spirit of the Little Way taught by Saint Therese of Lisieux.

My wife and I are big-time coffee drinkers. Neither one of us dares to tackle the day without that first cup of coffee on board. We are not connoisseurs of coffee by any means. We do not grind our own beans nor do we brew expensive brands. What we do enjoy, however, is the smell and the taste of freshly brewed coffee.

It may seem odd to think that making coffee for your spouse is a means by which you can grow in holiness. The key is to approach it with a spirit of love. You can’t do it begrudgingly, as some additional obligation required of you. Instead, you must see this as something beautiful that you can offer. Do not let the “littleness” of the act fool you. Holiness must be pursued in all aspects of our life, at all moments of our day.

If you are not already doing this for your wife, try it. Brew the coffee tomorrow morning. Pour it for her and prepare it exactly how she likes it. Then serve her. Repeat this every morning, as often as your schedule allows. Find out if she has a particular mug that she likes (easier to hold, lighter weight, sentimental value) and use that one.

As a Catholic husband I have been guilty in the past of overly enjoying St. Paul’s Letter to the Ephesians, when he instructs:

Wives, be subject to your husbands as you are to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife just as Christ is the head of the Church…

Just as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives ought to be, in everything, to their husbands.
(Eph 5:22-24)

Brewing the coffee and serving my wife in the morning helps me to remember the rest of St. Paul’s instruction when he states:

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Eph 5:25)

I would love to hear back from you. What little acts of kindness do you offer your spouse? Have these gestures of love helped to make your marriage more Christ focused and loving?

Posted on September 18, 2013, in holiness and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. On weekends, my husband makes me one of his trademark omelets for breakfast washed down by a mug of green tea. He’s been doing this for as long as I can remember.

    • Thanks for sharing Terry! It is amazing just how much these “little” things are appreciated. The more you speak to happily married couples you realize just how much they live this concept of kindness and love, such as a cup of coffee or an omelette.

      God bless!

  2. I’m not much of a coffee drinker but my husband is. He always offers me coffee in the morning despite knowing I almost always turn it down. I must confess sometimes I’ve even become slightly irritated at the same question. I’ve come to realize my husband has this small and ordinary gift that I don’t. He always thinks of me when he sits to eat or drink, even though I’ve never verbally or emotionally expressed my gratitude for his kindness. I don’t usually offer something I know will be turned down and in that way, dear hubby has one up on me. This is a wonderful blog. Sometimes I tend to distress when reading of the great saints and doctors of the Church and especially when thinking of the grace and holiness of Mary, Queen of Heaven. I think, how in the world can I ever even come close? You’ve answered that question here well. God gives us every opportunity to learn how to love and grow in love in the smallest most ordinary acts of daily life. Praised be Jesus Christ, now and forever!

    • Now and forever Amen!

      Thank you for your comment Cindy. Very thoughtful and heartfelt. I think all of us must always seek to use all of life’s little moments to grow in love. So many of the saints teach us that. I struggle with this daily, even with making coffee for my bride!

      God bless!

  3. Liturgy Guy's Daughter

    This is great! Humor, a conversational style, and a good message make this a great post. Good job Dad! 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: